since it has been a while and there is news it is time.
midway ct was last week. results:
most of the lung tumors/nodules are essentially not noted or much improved
lymph node near aorta is a couple of millimeters larger with and area of less density that could be necrosis or dead tissue
tumor markers coming down
so, doc does not see this as progression so we will continue on course with rest of treatments
there are issues however:
i am not doing well on this drug
the last couple of cycles have been hard
extreme fatigue, hands peeling, peeling rash on face
saw doc monday, taxotere is too toxic for me
we have to stop for a break to get me feeling better and get relief for the side effects
taking a few days of extra steroids for that
we will continue with another drug, perhaps return to taxol that i rec'd last year since i seemed to tolerate it better and the cancer responded to it
my right ear is roaring and seems "plugged"
saw ent doc, there is slight hearing loss in that ear
either chemical cause or tumor, no infection or fluid, but inner ear or nerve problem
had mri of head tonite, will get results tomorrow
how am i doing?
scared that without chemo it will start to grow again, it did before
why since the drugs seem to be doing a number on me can't it kill the damn cancer
my faith is low, it gets harder as time goes on
i am afraid that until i genuinely tell God "whatever" He will not heal me
i know in my heart i am at His mercy and "whatever" is what is in there
but i still don't want it to be over yet
just cannot help it
some friends assured me they are my "aaron" and will have faith for me
if you don't know the story of moses and his brother aaron look it up, it is great encouragement
i need lots more "aarons".........
